Valuing the Person Over the Employee
This week I am writing about something I have written about before. But I have been reminded of this critical tenet of leadership several times in the last seven days, and for this reason, I feel compelled to share it with you again. Life is full of challenges and you would be a fool to think that professional challenges are the only types of challenges ailing your team at work. When someone is struggling on your team, and you are trying to discern why they are struggling, don’t be so quick to assume that it’s just a professional struggle.
“How are you doing?”
My regular one-on-one meetings with my direct-reports are largely built for accountability and productivity. And yet, I am very deliberate about consistently starting each of these meetings by asking the open-ended question, “how are you doing?” I am clear with my team that I am asking about their well-being personally, entirely differentiated from how they feel about their professional state. I start here each time because I understand that if someone is struggling personally, there is no doubt that their professional productivity is struggling as well. The person-as-a-person must be attended to first and foremost over the person-as-an-employee. In the day-to-day hierarchy of human needs, the job you employ them to do is actually not your employee’s first priority – their personal life is, and that includes a whole slew of things paramount to their job. It includes their family, friends, finances, physical health, spiritual health, and much more. Of course, their job with you matters, but it only matters to the extent that it affords them the personal life they want for themselves.
Aspire and Inspire
Remember, people will follow you and call you ‘leader’ because you model or offer something they want for themselves. They see something in you that if they too had it, it would make their life better. And it could just be the professional position you have – by working under you, they see a route to grow into the professional position you currently hold. But if you, the leader, are building a life that only inspires someone professionally, you are cutting yourself short. Make sure your life is one of many facets that the people following you would love to have in their own lives. Build a supportive family, build your wealth effectively, strengthen your spirituality, improve your physical fitness, and increase your technical proficiency in all parts of your job. Again, that title ‘LEADER’ is a responsibility; it’s not something you just get to wear as a title in your company. To be called a leader is different and more than just a title.
Quiet the Worry
When you ask that first question – “how are you doing?” – and someone shows you feelings of fear, it often means they are feeling out of control [of something]. This translates to feelings of worry and anxiety, which can often be crippling to professional productivity. In my years as a leader, I have found that 9 times out of 10, someone experiences these feelings of worry and dread because they don’t have a plan in place to take them to that end-state of what right looks like. Now, this concept of preparedness and planning to overcome anxiety of the unknown is certainly not a novel concept in business. But we often fail to bring home the same exercises to our personal lives that make us productive in our professional lives.
When someone sits in worry before you, seek to understand the true problem that is worrying them and the cause of that problem. Ask great questions to help them realize clarity in their vision or plan for the end-state. By doing so, you will help put them back in control of their lives – at least for the moment. Now, the plan you draw up together may not go perfectly – most things in life rarely do. But just having a plan or a vision for what right looks like in the end pulls you out from the yoke of paralyzing anxiety. Putting you back in control reduces worry and fear and makes you feel stronger.
A word of caution, though: I don’t say all this to encourage you to be ‘the fixer’ to everything that ails anyone you employ. You certainly cannot fix everything; nor do you want to be someone that tries to fix everything. It is important to acknowledge that many times your people just want you to listen to them. They just need to be heard. I admit that I have struggled with this very thing myself because I am a fixer. I want to fix things. I want to see people have more than they have. I find my gut reaction is generally to attempt to diagnose and solve everything. But as I have aged, I have realized the power of listening and validation. Sometimes your people just need you to love on them. Maybe they already have a plan and a vision to get to that end state, and they trust in God’s timing for how things will work out. It is not always your problem to solve. It is, however, always your role and responsibility to love, listen to and support those who look up to you.
When you value the person-as-a-person over the person-as-an-employee, you will garner more respect as a leader. When you care about someone beyond their professional productivity, they will, in turn, care more for you as a teammate and human. When you understand the hierarchy of their personal life over their job, that is ultimately where you truly develop trust and loyalty.
Written by Schuyler Williamson
REALTOR. Leader. Veteran. Business Owner. Investor.
Weekly Email List: https://www.schuylerwilliamson.com/weekly-leader-note
God Bless!
~ Schuyler Williamson